Update 2

Hello from your Chubby Bunny,

I have not been feeling too well for some time now so it has been hard coming up with something to blog about this week. Seeing as I promised to be consistent I still wanted to put up something for you guys.

Rest. In all that we do let us not forget to take some time to rest. Do that which calms you down and de-stresses you. For a while, I've neglected the things that calm me and give me joy and this is because I have spent time working and worrying.

I forgot that even God himself rested after creating the world, he told us not to worry about things but to pray and cast those worries unto him. So for the longest time, I felt like I was carrying the world on my shoulders. Being in my final year had me thinking about my future and worrying that I was not doing the right things or living in my purpose. I was so focused on the future that I forgot about the 'now', I was not enjoying time with my friends or myself or enjoying the university experience. I started hiding and avoiding things that made me confront the world.

God had been calling out to me, asking that I see that he is with me and that I do not have to go through this year and life by myself but the voice of worry was so loud. My raging thoughts of insecurity and inadequacy were not allowing me to hear God and I couldn't pray. That made me feel so guilty and I found myself in a vicious circle that made me pull away from God even more.

By the grace of God, things are much better now. We had a Spirit-filled session with my youth fellowship and chains were broken. My friend was praying for me and I broke down (BTW I haven't been able to shed a tear for weeks despite feeling so empty and in need of a good cry). I finally let myself be still and let God's voice through and he gave me the assurance that I will be fine. I have felt such great peace since then.

We tell ourselves so often that God loves us and that he has got us but life can latch itself onto our backs and create doubts. One way to get through this is to surround yourself with the things that reaffirm and reassure you of God's love i.e. God's word, positive people, nature etc. I also made an active effort to go out of my house so I was not isolated, the days I just felt like avoiding my responsibilities and people I would ask (what is the blessing that the devil is trying so hard to take away from me?). If are going through something like this, you are not alone and things will get better. Just speak to God and find a confidant who you can talk to.

Anyhoo, I pray you all have a great weekend. I have a birthday to attend this weekend and I hope that comes with lots of bomb pictures.

Love Aunty Bunny xxx.