Update on my life.

Hello, Bunnies,

I am back like the boys (if you don't get this you're too young and please cherish your youth). Obviously as is my usual behaviour, I was supposed to update before now but after becoming recently unemployed (it's a good thing don't worry), I didn't realise how tired I was and I somehow needed to get two years worth of stress off my shoulders. So I have been sleeping and chilling my life away.

Apparently, when I gave my review of 2019, 2020 was snapping her fingers like a wicked Nollywood stepmother waiting to destroy your destiny. What a year it has been, am I right? Since finishing university,  have just been hoping into journeys for milestones with zero breaks. I recently had to document what I have done for the past two years and guys, in a nutshell, I have not been resting but now that I have a small break before I shackle myself to another journey, I am making the most of it. I am indulging my Id to the fullest because this life na one.

I spent most of the year undergoing the mandatory service year in Nigeria, it involved me working in an assigned office which is usually in your field of study so I have been a practising Barrister and Solicitor this past year. Dearly beloved, I have seen things, learnt things too but I have seen and been through things. Thank God that is a stage of my life that I am done with because like everything Nigeria, when you have to interact with her systems, institutions and, to a large extent, people you lose your sanity. You either lose it quickly and step into the shoes of the average Nigerian or it is a slow and antagonising process where you see yourself losing parts of yourself and forcefully have to hold on or reclaim them. I was the latter and I have lost parts of my sanity and I am still looking for them.

So I have successfully lost my hair, clear skin and my sanity.

One of the fascinating things I started this year was K-Dramas and guys, I fell hard into the Korean Entertainment universe because I am also being pulled by K-Pop. It literally started with me being curious in Netflix search area, I already watch Indian, Turkish, Pakistani movies and series but even those don't have such a stronghold on me like K-dramas. Even my Instagram algorithm has changed and is giving me more fancams and Korean stars on my explore page (tbh on a bad day they uplift me so much, the obsession is deep) and my twitter is a semi-stan account.

Started K-Dramas on the 28th of April, 2020 and these are the shows I have watched so far (actually completed series as I have started some and haven't finished them) 

1. Marriage Contract
2. Cinderella and the Four Knights
3. My Secret Romance
4. My contracted husband Mr Oh
5. Oh my Venus*
6. You are My Destiny
7. What's Wrong with Secretary Kim
8. Because this is My First Life*
9. Crash Landing on You
10. Oh My Ghost
11. Itaewon Class
12. Birth of a Beauty
13. Cheese in the Trap
14. My Holo Love
15. Lucky Romance
16. One More Happy Ending
17. Guardian: The Lonely and Great God
18. Love Alarm
19. Strong Girl Bong-Soon
20. Wok of Love
21. My ID is Gangnam Beauty
22. Love and Marriage
23. Her Private Life
24. Hyde, Jekyll, Me
25. The Bride of Habaek
26. Hotel del Luna
27. Weightlifting Fairy Kim Bok-Joo
28. My Secret Terrius

*Dramas I have watched twice.

Feel free to comment on new shows or which of the above dramas you really loved. Anyhoo, that most of my update for you guys, I am honestly trying to update more and be more consistent but looking at my new obsessions they might become very K-drama centred but that not a problem because a new goal is to break into the Korean market 😌. 

(I have no new images to add to the post so I included an avi creation I did of my ideal look and here is the link to create yours if you want to https://picrew.me/image_maker/380116).

Love,
BANNK xxx.

My Hair and Me

“Any woman with kinky textured hair - can wear it, love it and manage it. She only needs the right tools, inspiration and motivation.”
― Monica Millner

Hello Bunnies,

How are we?

So in recent times (the last three years) I've getting hella compliments on my hair. I'd literally be walking and people will stop me to tell me how nice my hair is, how they love my hair etc. I am not here to brag - my hair is really lovely though but even I didn't know this 5 years ago.

My hair hasn't always been great, in fact, my hair was a prayer point until four years ago. I am going to give you a timeline to understand what I and talking about

Age 0 - 1: I was born with nice hair, a full head of hair but like most black mums of our generation, my mum had it relaxed as soon as I was old enough so it was easier to manage (even in Africa there was subpar knowledge on how to take care of our own unprocessed hair, thank you colonisers).

Age 1 - 9: My hair got relaxed every month and even then it would get 'due' (need relaxing again) really quickly but I was young, I could still do my coloured braids and weave so I wasn't really bothered.

Age 10: I hated making my hair actually, my scalp is so sensitive so even my coloured braids and weaves were a b**** to make. And I went to a primary school that gave hairstyles to do every week (kuku peel my scalp). Well at this time I was very fed up with hair braiding and my mum was fed up with me so she said 'If you don't make your hair we're going to cut it' and immediately said 'let's do it'. So I cut my hair. I was even going to a secondary school where you cut your hair in September so I didn't care.

Age 10 - 11: I spent two terms in my first secondary school so my hair was getting cut every school holiday.

Still 11: I moved to new school in the final term of JSS 1/ Year 7 so my mum and I figured since this school isn't finicky about hairstyles let's start trying to grow your hair. Since I had a little growth from second term and the holiday we relaxed my hair so it looks longer. Let's just say LOL to the state of my hair in that period.

Age 12 - 15: This whole period is a big LOL for the state of my hair and the climax of my hair insecurities. So this period was a combination of relaxing, cutting, attempted braids which was all an epic fail. If my hair annoyed me that day, like I couldn't put a comb through it, I'd just go cut it (my mum was tired of me). My hair was so unhealthy and damaged and was not growing. And certain people in my school would make side comments about my hair that used to get to me. On one occasion I remember  making cornrows and one girl in my boarding house made a comment and I took it out that very day. My school let you do every and anything to your hair but you could not use any form of extensions (weaves or braids). So with me hating my hair in braid, I'd mostly attempt a ponytail when the hair was long enough, in my final year though I had a teacher that was constantly on my case about my hair and I could do anything with it because the only way it would stay in braids without unravelling is if I used extensions that are not allowed. SO I ended up getting a Rihanna cut (short at the back and long in from).

Age 16: I went to A-levels, now I could use extensions for braids and weaves which is what I did. I was also still relaxing my hair in my first year of A-levels. But during this particular holiday when I was home, I remember that I relaxed my hair and by the next week when I went to was my hair and get a weave done (at a different salon), the woman who was washing the hair was complaining that my hair was due for another relaxing. LOL madam I just relaxed this hair last week (she was in shock). Sha that is when I decided that the relaxer life was not for me, tbh I've always had issues with relaxers, I couldn't use adult relaxers cause they burnt me like hell and the children's one (which still burnt me) was not doing much for my hair. So I began transitioning.

Age 17 - 19: I was actually enjoying being natural. But my hair wasn't doing so great in the beginning of my journey. Part of reason being that I was learning on the job and my routine and products were not set down. But my friends that I met in uni started giving me tips, introducing me to better products and helping me make and manage my hair so I stared to see some progress. Then I also decided to go back to my roots and tweaked the routine my friends helped me establish. I started using a mixture of oils I made (the key ingredients being palm kernel oil) and my hair game changed. Palm Kernel oil is a family secret for greatness (of the skin and hair). We use it for the babies in our family but stop when they get older. So I figure if this was so effective why not give it a try and man it is good to go back to your roots.

Age 19: My hair was so luscious and full and the compliments were not even sought after any more cause they were everywhere. But I was also I bit frustrated with it cause I know what she could be and she wasn't at her full potential. So I did a big chop. My friends and mum wanted to chew me, everyone kept saying how it won't grown again and I'll learn my lesson (hahaha). But I assured them (with faith cause even I was apprehensive) that the hair will come back. I knew my hair now, I had my products and routine down. I actually know what I am doing with her now.

Age 20 - present: I cut my hair November 2017 by April 2018 I could no longer pull on my wig without braiding my hair down. WHAT!!! See God. By November 2018, my hair was back to the length it was when I cut it the year before (and that had originally taken me two years to grow). Now I have people stopping me to compliment my hair, people asking me for tips and product recommendations. Never knew this could be me. I because of the journey I know it's not because of genetics (that gave my a full head of hair and a mad good but confused curl pattern that I still love) but that wasn't the only player in achieving a healthy head of hair.

So that has been the journey with my hair. I hope you enjoyed it.

Love BANNK xxx.

Being a Single Nigerian Girl...

...In your 20s with a degree. HOW DARE YOU?

Hello, my Bunnies, I’m backkkkkk.

You! Nigerian Girl! Yes you, how can you come back from university without huzzband? Or boyfriend? Or we’re just friends Ma? A fine girl like you with hometraining galor and wife material kilometres long. It’s like you’re not serious, oya come and be collecting unnecessary side comments. 

Society/ Relatives

Please dear parentals, uncles and aunties, huzzband or boyfriend is not inside a shop or growing on a tree. You said we should read our books and focus on our education so why are you disturbing me about boy now?

Furthermore, since my cousin got married (yey!) and I'm the next oldest granddaughter, I’ve noticed that everyone has been looking at me: 'you're next', 'remaining you'. Please move back, a little backer and free me. If he comes, he comes, don’t stress me, please.  

Moreover, will a man give me a one-way ticket to heaven? 

Abeg leave single people alone, singleness is not a disease. Some of you even say 'eyaaa' when your friend tells you they’re single, are you alright? Eya fire. If I start saying 'pele' to you taken people, you’ll start having heartburn. Live your life, I live my life. 

Dating Scene

The dating scene in Nigeria is giving me a headache. Sha this is the only scene I’ve navigated because this is the only time I’m perceptive to the idea of dating. So I’m finally paying attention to the scene. 

First of all, am I the only one who is mega scared of the type of men she attracts. Like I keep thinking, Lord is this the one that my vibes call to because I am praying and casting against it oh. Old men (married) will be stepping to you or members of sufferheard Olympics and gatekeepers of misogyny association or fat fetish people. I don’t appreciate this. 

Then the guys I’m attracted to are so slow or taken. Obviously, when I come across taken men I’m quick to shut down whatever attraction because I’m not here for that ‘fight for your man’ rubbish. I cannot be fighting because of man, God forbid. I am bad-market for side chick movements. 

The slow guys are annoying and the problem is that so far Nigerian guys have a complex with girls who make the first move; ask them out first. Most of them start to think they are one kingpin. Sir, please be humble. Yes, I’m attracted to you and want to know you more but you’re not the only man on earth, drop your shoulders. 

Knowing the issues I have I don’t like to sit and wait for someone who’s attracted to me to come up to me first. Please oh, they scare me. So when I’m attracted to you, I want to tell you, go on a few dates and get to know you before I start investing in you or thinking of an actual relationship. We’re adults, two people of the opposite sex should be able to hang out and get to know each other before/ without labels. I shouldn’t be scared that I would be called desperate around friendship groups. Not everyone wants to husband you and tie you down, sometimes come and pick me, we go galavanting and you drop me off. Plus I like to know who I am pursuing with a more romantic flavour and who I am keeping platonic, I don't like mixing so I'd like to hang out to see where you best fit in. Of course, if I’m initiating contact you reserve the right to decline, I respect your autonomy and choice. But if you’ll be leading me on and giggling with friends behind my back, honey I’m not the problem and you have some serious growing up to do.

Sha please Nigerian men please don’t waste my phone number I beg you in God’s name. Just kuku leave it if it’s for decoration purposes. God bless you as you comply. 

I think that's it from me today.

Lovely people feel free to comment and share. What has being single been like for you?

Love from BANNK xxx.

I AM NOT WIFE MATERIAL

Contrary to popular opinion

I was not born to be a wife.

That is not the only standard of my life.

You are not my saviour

And marriage is not my heaven.

My body,

My heart,

My soul,

My abilities,

Are not for your consumption.

I wasn’t made for your pleasure,

I was made for His pleasure.

I am the Bride of he who died

So that I may rise.

Rise to life.

Rise to wholeness.

Rise to purpose.

To make me yours 

You need to be His first.

You need to understand my existence, 

And yours,

In the grander scale of His plans.

So no, I am not wife material,

At least not yours,

I am already a Bride with full knowledge of her Bridegroom.

If it be His will, then you may be a partner, 

With equal rights here and in heaven,

With equal rights to his love,

And His purpose. 

I am many faces of womanhood and humanity 

So I am not just wife material.

Happy International Women's Day xxx.

10 things you probably don't know about me

Hello from your Chubby Bunny,

This is a get to know me post. Before I begin to tell you more about myself, I'd like you guys to know that updates would start coming in bi-weekly. This is to allow me to alternate between the blog and my book on Wattpad. YES, I AM WRITING A BOOK. I might even write a stand-alone short story on there soon. So please follow me on Twitter so you are kept updated about everything and subscribe here so that you get notifications when I update.

On to getting to know me better.

So for the general stuff, I am 19 and my birthday is on the 21st of January. I am the youngest of two, I have an older brother and I am from Nigeria.

Where am I from?: Although I have mentioned that I am from Nigeria, in Nigeria, I am from a tribe in Southern Kaduna. My tribe is Attakar and we have our own language, traditional head and customs. So, no, I am not Hausa.

Talents: My talents include singing, acting and writing. I don't utilise them as much as I should but I am challenging myself. I have always been apart of school plays, I am apart of the worship team in my youth fellowship and I am writing a book on Wattpad (Yey!!!). I also have a wonderful ability to sleep at any time, anywhere and through anything.

Favourite food: I love Nigerian street food. I am totally obsessed, Nigerian street food isn't bite-sized, the portions are made to fill you up and that's probably another reason why I love it. It has everything from savoury to sweet things so your cravings are always met.

Type of music: I cannot choose a specific genre because my family and I are music geeks. I love Gospel, Reggae, Afrobeats (of course) from Fela to Wizkid. I love Beyonce, Celine Dion, Whitney Houston, Adele, Emily Sande, Yanni and so many others. If a song has mad beats or wonderful lyrics or both then it is for me.

Phobia: I am scared of Cockroaches, I cannot be in the same room as one. In fact, when I see cockroaches in my room I move to another room and sleep there. I also have a little apprehension of heights so I don't do roller-coasters but I love flying (contradictory I know).

Hobbies (spare time activities): I love reading and listing to music. I also love taking photographs when I am free and can take out my camera. Another hobby/talent of mine is procrastinating; I use one job to procrastinate another (eg. cleaning my room instead of writing my essay). If I really want to procrastinate then I just sleep and I know procrastination is bad so I am trying to work on it.

Favourite outfit: Even though I am a cool kid and I know how to dress my fine body. My favourite outfits are my PJs. I just love staying in my PJs. During the summer holidays (or most day TBH) when I have no plans, I just change from PJs to PJs. I wake up, shower and just slip on new PJs (my mum hates it but she's just happy that I am not sleeping the day away). I am very anti-social and tend to keep to myself so I love to be comfortable in my own space. If I had my way, I'd have more PJs than regular clothes but I have to attend classes and leave my house sometimes.

Favourite Memory: This would have to be summer trips and road trips my family and I took. It was very nice when we'd be together, shopping and sight-seeing. I love travelling and it was so nice doing it with my family.

Countries I have been to: I have been to Nigeria, the UK, USA, Gambia, Cote d'Ivoire, Canada. I have transited through Germany and Senegal. I 'd love to add more countries to this list.

Relationship Status: I am a single pringle. That is all I have to say about this question🤣

I hope you guys enjoyed this post. I'll see you in 2 weeks.

Love Aunty Bunny xxx.